Toxic People SUCK… the life out of you.
There is no doubt that the people you surround yourself can have an effect on you good or bad.
We all have the direct ability to change the course of someone else’s mood or day based on the mood, energy, or attitude we bring into a situation. When you walk into a room filled with happy people celebrating, you can feel the high vibes of those who are laughing, singing, smiling, and carrying on. It’s a good feeling space and, unless you are totally anti-social, you leave feeling pretty good yourself, having been surrounded by those happy, celebrating people. On the other hand, if you walk into a room where a there has just been an argument, the tension in the air can feel so thick you could cut it with a knife. You may well leave that room feeling tense, uncomfortable, or even zapped of energy.
Let’s face it being around negativity really doesn’t feel good.
The bad news is: This is life on Earth, and negativity cannot be avoided… completely. Unicorns may fart rainbows; humans don’t. There are a lot of things or situations that flat out stink.
The good news is: You can make choices on how much negativity you subject yourself to on a daily basis. AND you can make choices on how negative your attitude is on a daily basis.
You can start by taking stock of the people you spend the most time with day to day, week to week, month to month…
- Do they make you feel good or leave you feeling like crap?
- Do they fill your cup or empty it?
- Do they support you and your dreams or scoff and tell you to be someone else?
- Do they build you up or put you down?
- Does their life revolve around finding solutions or whining about all the problems?
How do the people in your life stack up to what you wish to experience or how you’d like to feel?
Motivational Speaker, Jim Rohn, has been quoted to say:
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
Think about that.
Who do you spend the majority of your time with? If you find yourself constantly drained, overwhelmed, or frustrated after spending time with them, maybe it is time to change things up. What if you decided to spend more time with people whom you know would fill your cup and less time with those who empty it?
The Minimalists say:
“You can’t change the people around you, but you can change the people around you.”
In other words, you cannot change the behaviors, habits, or attitudes of others… only your own. You can, however, change whose behaviors, habits, or attitudes you surround yourself with. So, if you are feeling like the life is being sucked out of you, check in with the kind of toxic relationships you are surrounding yourself with.
And if you haven’t done so already, make the time to check in with your own behaviors, habits, and attitudes. You don’t want to be the sucky one others are trying to avoid, do you?
Toxicity breeds toxicity.
I’ve been on both sides of the fence and let me tell you: Having awareness is key.
There was a time when I was the girl who went to work every day complaining about my relationship and went home every night complaining about my job. Until I realized it got me nowhere and I was miserable. The people I spent the most time with were also miserable. I had to make some decisions and change my habits. And, when all else failed, I changed the people and situations as well. You can’t change those who do not want to change. You can only change your relationship (or lack thereof) with them.
It’s ok to walk away. It’s ok to try something new. It’s ok to be you. And it’s ok to surround yourself with the kinds of people you want to be surrounded by.
Just in case you were wondering…
~ Jody Pogo :o)
“We don’t need no haters
We’re just trying to love one another
We just want y’all have a good time
No more drama in your life..” ~ Mary J. Blige | Family Affair